Lockdown Love

Okay, time to spill the beans. And these are no ordinary beans. These are good beans. Deliciously seasoned, lovingly prepared beans to be served with rice and vegetables as a humble but tasty meal. I have something that it's high time I share. This is important, exciting, and definitely a thing that merits a blog post.

But first, now that I have your attention, I want to commend all of you for whatever you've been doing in the quarantine. This is one of the most insane times in all of human history and you're still here. Anything you do can be celebrated. I know this time has put a lot of strain on people's friendships, family ties, marriages, and romantic relationships.

And speaking of romantic relationships (see that painfully obvious transition?), the quarantine has actually improved my previously nonexistant love life. I'm dating someone! And you know what that means, you nosey, nosey people. Story time!

It all started at Katsucon. Yes, I met my current boyfriend at con. You may all have heart attacks and die of not surprised. I was bouncing around like a marble in a dryer, as I do. As often happens, we absorbed people into the group and hung out together.  One of those people was Alex, whom we dubbed "the lost puppy." He was at con in need of a group to drag him around and we were only too happy to oblige. And for anyone wondering, I was dressed as Ms. Frizzle from Magic School Bus. Hey, a cosplay of an adult woman, it could have been so much weirder.

Truly an icon of feminine beauty

As we talked, the group found him charming and intelligent and a person we would like to be around. This, we exchanged contact info. We continued running around together throughout con, enjoying the panels, vendors, and other attendees.

Then, a few weeks later, came *dun dun dunnnnn* the lockdown. Alex contacted me and asked if I would like to be in a game of Mage (a fantasy RPG, think Dungeons and Dtagons). I love fantasy RPGs, so I agreed to join. As we created my character and he told me about the world he was building, we talked about a little bit of everything and a connection started to form.

Anyone who has been around me for very long knows that I am AWFUL at knowing whether I'm being flirted with or not. And even worse at knowing whether I like someone or not. But we finally got around to the "do you think you might like me because I think I might like you" conversation and concluded that we did and would like to try a date.

On April 22 (I had to ask him what the exact day was because days blend together in quarantine), we had a phone date, and it went really, really well. To an outside observer, it may not have sounded particularly romantic, but it was exactly the kind of romance I like. We connected on a cerebral level in a way I never have with anyone I've ever gone out with. Of course I was having a lot of "don't do it, he lives in Virginia, this is impossible" but......screw it. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. I wouldn't be the first one to start a relationship over distance, and I definitely won't be the last.

Our second date was over video, and this was the first time he saw me (outside of my pictures) in my natural state, with my real hair, daily makeup, and usual fashion. We were both liking what we see 😉 our next date was also over video, and as the three-date rule declares, we were committed. Boyfriend and girlfriend, aiming for the long haul, here we go.

He's been working remotely since the pandemic, so dates have been easy to schedule. He had some time off that needed to be used, so he's visiting me in August. Long-distance is not an ideal scenario,  but we're making it work pretty well. And it's not going to be forever, we are wanting this to go somewhere. For now, we enjoy learning new things about each other and having fun in any ways we can. We both love exploring and learning new things and having unique experiences. Okay, I could gush a lot more, but this blog post is already getting long. So, are you ready to meet him?

There he is. Alex Bosert. 6 foot 1, 24 years old, birthday Sept 15. Isn't he cute? Side note: I asked him for a picture to put in the blog and this was his first idea. This is what he was wearing when we met. Yeah, we're pretty adorable.

Alex will no doubt be appearing in future blog posts. I can't wait for my friends to meet him. He's pretty amazing, if I do say so myself.

So there you go, the story of my now changed relationship status. Well what do you know, something good did come out of 2020. I can't wait to see where this is headed.

Art: Creation vs. Consumption

So, since the lockdown started in mid-March, I've been keeping a running list of new recipes that i\I've tried, just to see how many I make. I wasn't making any effort to do as many as possible or anything, I would just write them down as I made new things. I stopped adding to it last week since I was finally back to a normal work schedule and it feels like while my life is far from normal (cue pouting childishly about coventions being cancelled), I'm not really locked down anymore. That list of recipes is 23 items long.

I started making a new cosplay right before the lockdown. I was fresh off of Katsucon and had the itch in my fingers to make another (as I do). Looking at my Instagram progress pictures, I was able to track it start to finish. I made my entire Pokemon trainer outfit in almost exactly one month. That is by far the fastest I have made a cosplay start to finish. And this is no small undertaking. Look at this baby

Hey, I made the thing from scratch in a month, I'm allowed to shove pictures of it in people's faces. 

In an attempt to use up some leftover fabric, I made some special gifts for my nieces and nephews (and didn't even make a dent in my big tote of leftover fabric). My sister and her husband are raising five little munchkins, so if I make anything for them, I have to make five.I'm not going to say what I made because it's going to be a surprise at Christmas. Talk about getting an early start!

Given all of this extra time and told to do one of my least favorite things (stay still), I have had some time to think about my tendency to do a thousand projects and what draws me to different ones. Allow me to explain.

In general, there are two ways that I participate in art: creation and consumption. Sometimes, when I take in a new form of art, my fingers just start itching and I have to create something in this new art form. For example, when I first learned of cosplay from my dear friend Rachael, I knew that is was something I HAD to try. I was not content merely to consume, I had to create, to participate, to make myself a part of this grand piece of art! I could do a con without cosplaying,  loads of people do, but I just done want to. I want to cosplay!

When I see a costume that would look particularly good on me or that looks really fun to make, My brain starts deconstructing it and thinking about what materials it would take, where I can find said materials, if I have any pieces on hand that I can use. When people ask "How did you know what to do?" about my costumes, that's it. We can all go home now, Kim's revealed the trade secret. It just kind of happens. I see costume, I get creative brain blast, I build it.

The same thing happens when I see a recipe that I find interesting, but with a bit of variation. I know what most ingredients taste like, so instead of seeing how a costume is made, I can do something I call "tasting in my brain" and have a guess at what something should taste like. I can generally tell if a recipe will taste good just by looking at it. Granted, I have made some flops, but no one else has to endure them. That's why people think all of my cooking is delicious. If it's not, I use the "brain taste" to add things until it tastes the way I want it to.

But not all art forms elicit this waterfall of inspiration. I adore movies, and I am always up for a movie that does something new or makes me think. But am I instantly overcome with the desire to make a movie? Not really. I love to read, I devour books like I devour a plate of sushi. But do I have the burning desire to write a novel like the ones I enjoy? Not particularly. And there are some that I enjoy, but not enough to really seek out and get good at. I enjoy painting my nails and seeing what other people do, but I don't have any real drive to learn all of the fancy techniques.

Some forms of art I feel content to consume, but some fuel my passion to create. I feel like there is value in recognizing which art forms fit into which category. Just because I'm a creative person, it doesn't mean I want to partake in every kid of art. There are some that simply aren't my style, or I probably could enjoy them but there are only so many hours in the day and I'm technically supposed to be asleep for some of that. I should probably be at work in there, too. 

I promise I have a point to all of this. The creation of art is often seen as the only way to really participate in art. But honestly, consumption is also an important part of any artistic endeavor. If no one was there to consume the art, then it wouldn't have near as much impact. There is something to be said for making art purely for your own enjoyment, but the sharing of art also has tremendous value. There needs to be people to take in and enjoy the fruits of creative labor. The audience is just a much a participant as the creator, the distributor, and anyone else who is more directly involved.

So if you haven't really felt the inclination to make anything lately, don't make the mistake of thinking you're not still involved in art. If you have consumed the creativity of another person and enjoyed it, then you're still involved here! It's important to enjoy being an audience member and not feel like you have to get involved in everything. There is plenty of good to be gained from simply stepping back and taking in a piece of art. My blog is art (note that I did not say it was good art), and you are consuming it. Congratulations, you are participating.

I hope you've all created or consumed something of value lately. It's just as important, if not more so, to feed the soul as well as the body.