I direct that all expenses of my final illness, be it COVID19, loneliness, or actual death by boredom, and expenses of my funeral (which will be live streamed) and burial be paid as soon as is reasonably convenient, and I hereby authorize my Personal Representative to settle any claims against my estate.
In my departure, provisions must be made for my dear cat. Puff is to be taken care of by any friend who will have her, until she also departs and will be buried on top of my remains, so that she may rest where she lived the majority of her life.
I fear I do not have long left in this world. The threat of COVID19 has left me with no social events and limited access to even my closest friends. In recent days, even my coworkers have become sparse due to reduced staffing. I suffer from a condition that makes this situation a grave one. I am an extrovert. I draw energy from social interaction. And, deprived of that vital source of energy, I am slowly withering away. My limbs grow weak and frail, I can barely lift my fingers to type these words. As my mind starts to slip away, my parting thoughts are of great irony. In a time of such illness and crisis, it is not the dreaded virus that pulls the final curtain, but the measures needed to protect society. I hope only that more extroverts will not fall as I have. We are many, so who knows the true extent of the damage.
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Okay, okay, I was being dramatic, calm down. I make jokes (and sometimes very dark ones) because if I don't laugh, then I must cry. It's just how I deal with a situation beyond my control. Although to be perfectly honest, I'm actually doing quite well. I have two friends who live in my apartment complex whom I have designated as "family" and they are pretty much the only people I see in person outside of work.
Speaking of work, I work in a medical laboratory, so this pandemic affects my daily life more than the average person. The lab I work at doesn't do COVID19 tests (yet), but we still have to stay on top of how quarantine affects healthcare fields. We're considered essential and our work cannot be done remotely, so I still go into work, but not every day. We split the staff into two shifts and work on opposite days, so I only work three days per week, ten hours per day. The company makes up the difference in pay, which is a huge blessing in a time when a lot of places are cutting staff. I have a letter in my car stating my position as an essential worker in case the authorities start questioning people for being out (hasn't happened yet, but it could). That letter is such a piece of history that I'm keeping it as a relic of this moment in time.
Never have I been so grateful for electronic communication. I have been able to keep in contact with most of my friends and family to keep from going stir crazy. Everyone has time for long conversations, that's for sure! I wander around my complex (at a responsible distance) while I talk, and I'm pretty sure you could make a game of counting how many times I pass any one apartment.
My creative hobbies have obviously been used quite a bit in this quarantine. I have literally gotten scared that I'll run out of stuff to do and bought a few future projects' worth of stuff. Other people buy huge amounts of toilet paper and bread, I buy three costumes' worth of fabric and thread. Speaking of which, now is the time to try and learn something new! Order some stuff online and watch some YouTube videos, you've finally got the time. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have my sewing to keep me busy. And let's I'mnot forget my love of cooking and baking. keeping a list of all of the new recipes I've tried since lockdown (I'm literally making like, three new things per week) and I'll post it when quarantine is up just for fun.
My only venture out besides groceries and work was on Easter Sunday, when I joined a friend and her parents for Easter dinner. I wanted to contribute something, so I made a hummingbird cake. It's made with bananas, pineapple, and pecans and covered in cream cheese frosting. I think it's one of the best things I've made during the lockdown! I got creative with the pecans on top, like I do.
If you want a rich, Easter-y dessert that is a little something different from the traditional carrot cake, this is your ticket. Everyone really enjoyed it and I was so blessed to be able to share in the celebration of the Resurrection with even a small group of people. Jesus rose from the dead, and that's worth celebrating even if we can't be all together.
I'm still here, still making stupid jokes and baked goods, and who knows where we'll all be tomorrow. I hope everyone is doing their best to stay both physically and mentally healthy during this pandemic. See you next post.
